Today the sun moves into Aries, and crosses the Equator as far as angle. It is Spring Equinox, and the day when light and dark are in perfect balance. I look around me and ask if I am living a life in balance
I still struggle with my weight, but have come to embrace that I am doing this for more than a low number on a scale. I am changing my relationship to food and exercise from one of mindless movement due to economic factors to one of support and nurture.
I am surrounded by groups of people who have become very argumentative or destructive. Rather than devote time and energy to their battles, I choose to devote my energies to the practices I am trained in to help those in need.Light begets light, and manifestation follows after intention. So rather than allowing myself to be brought down, I travel upward.
I have made no eggs this year.Rather than do a large number of them for my own symbolic intentions, I am considering making them to give as gifts for my family members. Trick is, after these are made I will have to blow them out lest they rot or get broken in transit. Then how should I form display stands for each ? Once again rather than focusing within, turning the energy outward to expand.
I give up worry about the future. The world I was led to believe would be a reality when I was a child is nothing like the reality of the world i live in as an adult. Things I was trained to do have disappeared, and in their place is a new set of realities that no one knew would be , let alone how to solve. Such as cell phones, and the fact that alarm bells, telephone ringing bells, door bells and warning systems have all become beeps that are pretty indistinguishable from each other. Meaning if something chirps, drop everything you are doing to figure out if you are supposed to wind your ass or put out your phone. Nothing in my education prepared me for this reality( you were taught to memorize actual phone numbers and spell full words rather than hit a number on speed dial and text message ). The very same things will be true for my son. Rather than worry that he is not a bastion to the info of yore, I will celebrate the fact that he knows how to learn, does so quickly, and has little fear of embracing anything new. He will be fine.I will wander around the mall like a confused old lady who thinks debit cards have a weird energy and kisses the ground in thanks that she has her PIN number securely memorized. No one has decided we need a speed dial button for that one yet.
I see God as an even bigger reality than I did three years ago, and have come to see pagan rituals and practices in the same fashion as Christian ones. Both limit the reality , ability and power. Religion itself is a stumbling block to union with the Divinity.
I sense that a corner has been turned, and I wonder if things can ever go back. Nothing stays static for certain, but some changes are not the most productive. There is suddenly a grand canyon of distance where there was simply a small line in the sand. Is this simply the destructive phase of the growth cycle ( yes this is so- before you plant you must till the soil to remove the existing growth), or is this the fork in the road ? Has there come an uncovering of the root of the most serious problem at hand- and if so can this be fixed without a serious and intelligent mediator ?
May this day of balance bring me the wisdom to discern what I must.